So its been over a month, I'm at the same weight as I was in early February and I am still unemployed. Its honestly going to be the death of me, I'm excited about nothing, I used to love cooking, even that can't cheer me up anymore. and I am going to whinge about this but I can't help it, its gotten very strange for me.
I believe in the 'law of attraction' and I believe in making things happen by thinking them.... so I guess I haven't been thinking about slimming down, and not been thinking about working?? is that it? I'm willing this stuff on myself?? I wanna say I want my mommy, but its very difficult for me to face up to all this 'failure' so to say, because I used to be a good achiever, I've had interviews where I was hired straight away, but now? is it because I'm a second class citizen? a political term but I often find myself faced with it, feeling neglected for not belonging to a land, an ideology or even an attitude. the services of others, the way people sometime look at you.... the list is endless....
I need to get my positivity back .... where is it? and why????
I just think there have been way too many changes in my life, I got married, had a new life and lifestyle to adjust to, I was also not having the best time at work, as a result I quit my job (in Oct 10) and now (march 11) i'm still unemployed, I want to lose weight and that's not happening, where did I go wrong? how can someone screw up so much with them self? i'm just happy I didn't hurt anyone else on the way, and I hope I am not hurting my husband by being unemployed. we could really do with a second income. I love the people who support me and who have been praying for me standing behind my every move, and I want to thank you for doing this, but I can't help feeling hurt with all my efforts somehow not working out.
I will give this a big last shot, pumping myself up to make sure I am a survivor. and that I stay that way.
send me some strength... oblivion.
